You want to do a suspension, bungee jump the Niagara, paint on people walls, tattoo your face, say whatever you wanted to say to someone, travel around the globe, have sex with the same sex, run around naked and scream: "ice cream!", cancel your job, because you hate your boss, open up a speakers corner somewhere or drug yourself to death - then do it!
Life is precious! It is, because: there is no reason to waste thoughts about: if, else, then, maybe, perhaps, because it is bullshit to limit yourself to other people ideals. Being free, means to be free, be yourself, express yourself and giving a shit about what's on other people minds.
Eva (the mom of someone who is important to me) taught me that we're still nothing in this universe like dust, but we have to arrange ourselves with society and I'm pretty sure that it is oxymoronic. IF! If life is meaningless like a grain of dust, it is logic to assume that I'm not alone (dust always comes in plural/other grains of dust) - but all those grains exist independently from each other. We're just jumbled at the same place (because of physics). I have had not the decision to separate myself - but if Mother Nature thinks so - I'll be on my own. It is not my fault and I do not feel guilty.
Once you ate from the apple of wisdom, you will be separated and or banned from paradise, which is namely the crowd. Once you are part of the crowd, you will feel connected - but once you loose connection, you will be separated and left as individual. UNTIL you meet another individual - likely to yours.